toxic roach city

226 posts...feels like a lot more.

so i had to buy roach killer today. this is very hard for me because i was raised around a lot of zen buddhists and I have a hard time killing anything. when we were kids we were taught to flick mosquitos to knock them out instead of kill them (i only realized that was a joke on us much later.) the roach killer department has a lot of death options for the roaches.

quick kill formula
immediate kill formula for roaches and their eggs
kills quickly, keeps on killing
killing starts immediately, killing continues for up to 18 months
kill kill kill, with extra killing

i'm sorry roaches but you are fucking disgusting and i found three of you in the CLEAN dishwasher. you have to go. how the fuck did you get in there stop terrorizing me.

i just put the roach bait stations out and feel like i'm about to go into toxic shock i swear there is roach killing in my pores help me jesus help me tom cruise.


and speaking of tom cruise, did ya'll see when oprah went over to his freaky mansion in the mountains? jesus, tom, we get it already. fuck you and your pretentious monogrammed uggs. get over it america.