today is a nice day for food poisoning

don't eat here, it may be campy as hell and have good $5 margaritas but they come with a side of food poisoning, just ask my friend Keith.


today is a gorgeous day.

there are two types of gorgeous days.

one type is the kind like today where the birds (okay, they are seagulls, which are annoying, but whatever) are out singing (squawking) and flying around in the sunshine which makes me happy and wish i was wake surfing in a bikini with a cold drink waiting for me in the boat.

the other kind is the kind where you wake up like a vampire at 2PM to a full-on sunny day in san francisco and you want to kill yourself because you were up since thursday doing coke in the mission and you feel like the worst person ever to set foot on the earth and your eyes can't adjust to the light when you are taking your walk of shame to the corner store to buy mac and cheese because you are broke and haven't eaten in three days and you need something immediately or you will pass out on the sidewalk and you walk by little kids on your way to the corner store and you silently yell at them "don't turn out like me!!!!" and then when you make it home and collapse immediately onto your bed which is really a pull-out couch you got at the thrift store on Post Street because you live in a studio and can't afford a futon and feel like a total loser.

Sometimes i get that total loser feeling by default just because it's sunny out.

but today isn't one of those days.

thanks to franki for the pic, it was great to see you. xoxo

THIS IS THE MOST DEPLORABLE THING I'VE EVER FUCKING SEEN.

I just found out about this total and complete bullshit at satchel of gravel.


This dog was tied to a wire in a corner of a gallery and allowed to starve and die as ART. Because death and suffering are art now.

Starvation is art.

and to think that whole holocaust thing happened and no one was able to revel in the artistic glory because Guillermo Habacuc Vargas hadn't come along yet to show us the light.


And fuck all these people just chillin in the gallery eating canapes while this dog starves quietly in a corner.

Sign the petition!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Guillermo has actually been commissioned to do this again in 2008, sign the petition and repost the address and make a fucking big deal about this asshole. I think he should man up and tie himself to the wire in 2008. Now that shit would be art.

SIGN SIGN SIGN SIGN SIGN SIGN SIGN SIGN SIGN SIGN
!!!!!

HNT starvation diet edition

HHNT!

this little potbelly is all i have to live on for the next few weeks. wish me luck.

xo

dee

okay, fine, boobs too!

right now i'm at that magic level of brokeassness where i just don't give a fuck anymore.

i've recently reached a new level of poverty. all the old college survival tips are back in effect.


stealing toilet paper, for example. and using old jam for sweetener in tea. i'm thinking about taking change in to buy 1/2 & 1/2 because tea isn't the same without 1/2 & 1/2 and it's especially not the same with jam instead of honey.

every last cent is sunk in the business. this will be funny one day when i look back and laugh about how broke i was when i was trying to get this shit off the ground. but it's really not funny now. if this goes on much longer i'll be forced to research ways to cook chihuahua.

(sleep with one eye open, homie)

YES!!!

funniest shit ever. pun intended.

check yourself

WHAT

THE

FUCK.

Where are these ferocious cotton 80's sweaters coming from? (and i do'nt mean ferocious like "ferosh!" i mean ferocious like they just brutally attacked my eyes with their gnashing hideosity.) I guess i understand shannon doherty's because she hasn't been famous since 90210 and is still probably clinging to her sexy 80's icon status, but Britney and Jennifer have no excuse. and don't even get me started on the Ugg boots. Ugg boots? seriously? you have more money than god, a personal trainer, a kick ass body, and a stylist, and this is the best you can do?